Thanks to Laura for tagging me because I felt like writing but didn't have a subject.
1) As Lyn discovered in a recent blog comment exchange, my mom used to call us "dildos" when we were kids. She would use it in place of words like "silly" or "goof." She'd laugh and then say, "Don't be such a dildo!" When I found out what a dildo actually was, I couldn't help but wonder how many times I had used it improperly and, thus, made a total dildo of myself.
2) I take a shower every night. I have a bathroom in my bedroom with a shower stall as opposed to a bathtub/shower combo and the stall is relatively small but it works for me. When I've had a stressful day (I've had many in recent weeks), I get in the shower and sit down on the floor and just let the water run over me. Yes, I could do that standing up but it's more relaxing for some reason to sit down. 
3) Perhaps it's the tight space that calms me. During the final 3 years of my marraige, I primarily slept on the couch. I literally couldn't fall asleep in bed next to my husband. But I slept like a baby (and often with my baby) on the couch. 
4) If I hadn't stumbled upon Laura's tag, I was going to enter this short essay contest. In 200 words or less, I was to address "Tom Cruise's Scrotum." I actually did a bit of Scientology research for this. This was to be my thesis statement: "Naturally, because he is the highest-ranked Scientologist ever, Tom Cruise has a very real responsibility to his scrotum as well as to the scrotums of past, present, and future Scientologists." I'm not really sure where I was going with that but I'm pretty sure it was going to be funny.
5) My best friend and I used to steal hood ornaments off of cars. It was the cool thing to do in seventh grade. Her mom used to help us by dropping us off in parking lots and keeping watch. I forget about this. I often pride myself on the fact that I've never stolen anything. As it happens, that's not really a fact at all. We turned out okay, though. After all, I'm a student on the 15 year plan and she's a vagina doctor (who text-messaged her hubby that she wanted and embryo for Christmas). Well, she turned out okay, anyway.
6) My oldest friend Abbey and I spent 11th grade American Literature passing notes back and forth consisting of song lyrics. The object was to guess what song it was and then come up with one of your own. I kept up pretty well even though her knowledge of music is way more extensive than mine. She introduced me to Erasure, after all.
7) I still played Barbies in sixth grade and Dew(ed) knows exactly what I mean by this. I set up furniture, dressed and primped them, but never actually got around to playing with them.
8) I had several different boyfriends in junior high (2 weeks here, 3 days there) but didn't actually have my first kiss until I was in high school. And I'm sure it showed.
9) My mom let me have a big 16th birthday party. She bought tons of food, a cake, the whole nine yards (Beth even pulled me aside to ask if any of my friends would be smoking pot and, if so, could they please do it in the basement?) and left the house. Then there was a big snowstorm and only 3 people came. One of them lost control of his car in the driveway when he was leaving and ran over the mailbox.
10) When my brother and I would play with his He-Man toys, we'd have He-Man and She-Ra make out. Even though they were brother and sister.
I can't in good conscience tag anyone as I did that 2 blogs ago. If you decide to do this, link it in the comments.
No comments:
Post a Comment